Ritualistic Black Death Hecatomb.

2 unholy flies of the apocalypse bestial fornicating on a fungus.

Black sodomy of the donkey of Jehovah!

Painstorm penetration of hades (with reacharound).

Sacrificial shit food devourment.

Doomed Heretic of 72 Rituals Of Necromancy And Perversion (Jock x Rachel).

Commander Of Demoniac Eucharist and Vomitor Of Black Blood (Gav x Bang).

Cannibal Priest Impalator Of Malevolent Armies Under Leviathanic Rule (Rachel x Jock).

Black Witching Phone.

Satanic church of alcoholocaust (a pub).

Ceremonial nuclear ritual of acoustic warfare. Guy played a great cover of Crush The Jewish Prophet by Inquisition.

Golgothian boredom through wax invocation after acoustic ritual's end.

Bloooooodclaaaaaaaat.

So - officially filming for the Landscape vid is over as of yesterday. Rory got his banger at the last second and give or take any last minute hit and run missions it's just me and the edit cave from now on. Being at home might save my marriage too seeing as Rach has pointed out that I've been away for the last 7 weekends (some of them 4 dayers too).

Oh and I'm a knob...

Here's some horsing around from the last few weeks.

House real big, cars real big, dick real big, etc.


Comfortable with my sexuality.


Jon had one of those wizard staff party bonfires. I think Oscar may have taken it. You seen Beauty and The Beast yet? I was at the premiere bruv, drunkenly chewing Jeron and Biebel's ears off about whatever shite it was I thought was important. Free drinks parties are no good for my social networking skills.



He may not be able to stand but he can still throw up a T!


"ELLO! GIRL!!" etc

I have no chance of ever becoming a Wizard. 7 cans gets up to my waist! I'd be in casualty by the time I got to my shoulders. Bear in mind that the americans do it with Bud Light and PBR which contain about 1.3% alcohol. Benders.

Thanks to Ian for this one. I think it's a thank you anyway.

Spot check pics.

Apparently not designed for skateboarding.




Ches and Sloth from the Goonies were out the other night.


Sloth dropped his phone down into someone's basement and had to climb down to get it. I think they were in too.




Stella's actually a very sweet dog.

Where's good to go?!?

Bruce, Dave, John, Dan and I got together in Bournemouth at the weekend for our annual weekend. Whoever picked Bournemouth out of the randomizer® should be ashamed! What a shithole! Apart from the torrential rain it appeared to have nothing but geezers in Ben Shermans shouting outside bars called Bliss or strip bars right on the main high street. Not down a back alley like any respectable red light district but right opposite Abbey National and the Spastic Society shop (I know it's called SCOPE now, I'm old!)

I've never felt so much like a Morrissey in my life. Compared to the men of Bournemouth I felt like a gay poet dressed in an outfit that said FIGHT ME. The next morning we realised that this was almost certainly all in our imagination and if anything the local lads probably looked at us and thought we were from the town planning department or something. "Awww, don't start on them - they're old, it wouldn't be fair."

When I took this I really trought it might be the only photo of the weekend as were on our 18th lap of Bournemouth trying in vain to find a normal pub to drink in. We ended up in a snooker hall.



No, I don't know either.

"I wish I'd had one of these down the Wine Lodge"




Don't ask. Dave was carrying this in his pocket all night.




He makes my heart sing!




Judging by the photo I'd say Freak Scene just came on the juke box.



ZZZZZZ..



Oh and yeah - this is one of the most upsetting things I've have created.






No we didn't go in this year. That's Jack from Lost right there though.





Just look at this old lion.

Oh no! He's clocked us taking the piss!






Saw this king on the way home.

Found more face 50/50s on my phone. Rach x Vikki.

Guy x Vikki.

Me x Rach.

Asher x Guy.



So finally we have a podcast for Landscape. After a few days of grappling with the finer technical points of XML files and RSS feeds I am now a more learned individual with a better world view and an appreciation of friendless-geeks everywhere. That shit is hard!
Click the logo and have a look at the trailer for the new vid and some of the older bits I whacked up there too. Subscribe now!