28 September 2006

Run! Hop fences, jump over benches...

Jack is back! After 3 months in the states he made a triumphant homecoming appearance at Tuesday Crew (err, on Tuesday) and came up to skate in London yesterday with Fos, Tamsin and Nick. Good to see these two in cahoots again, they never fail to make me wet myself with laughter.
I've always wanted to take a photo of this shop. "Military and industrial obsolete semiconductors". How much passing trade can they get?...

"Oooh hurry up Greville, Tesco's shuts in 20 minutes...HOLD ON! Oh! I can't say I've been looking for one but now I've seen them I'd really like a military or even industrial semiconductor! Oooh, aren't they lovely! I don't care that they're obsolete, I simply must have one! Won't that look nice on the mantlepiece Greville?...Greville?" Mudchute baby! Everyone had to do frontside wallrides (present company excepted thankfully)

Instead I got to pose (and I really did as you can see) for a photo by this beautiful street art. Photo by Tamsin, 2006.Nick has two dots tattooed above his nail to make his thumb look like a duck. The long winter evenings must just fly by in the Worthington house.

Oh, and this happened in the middle of last night. It scared the FUCKING SHIT out of me. Those curtains weigh a ton and made the loudest noise when they fell down, ripping the curtain rail out of the wall. Cheers, great. Thanks world.

26 September 2006

They had more worth than any living thing on earth

OK, (part of) the best conversation i've had on MSN in ages...read it and weep!

somebody get me some TEA goddamnit says: (10:59:53 pm)
did i tell you my 'if you build it, they will come' theory?

COME TO BUTTHEAD says: (11:00:02 pm)

COME TO BUTTHEAD says: (11:00:04 pm)
ha ha!

somebody get me some TEA goddamnit says: (11:00:31 pm)
it's all about creating a space for sex.

somebody get me some TEA goddamnit says: (11:00:39 pm)

making your bedroom super nice

somebody get me some TEA goddamnit says: (11:00:49 pm)

keeping your bikini line waxed

COME TO BUTTHEAD says: (11:00:54 pm)
ha ha ha

COME TO BUTTHEAD says: (11:01:00 pm)
you're so probably right!

somebody get me some TEA goddamnit says: (11:01:04 pm)
dressing like your going to meet somebody each day.

COME TO BUTTHEAD says: (11:01:08 pm)
ha ha

somebody get me some TEA goddamnit says: (11:01:13 pm)
ok. i gotta catch a bus.

COME TO BUTTHEAD says: (11:01:15 pm)
i'm laughing so hard right now!

And later in the converastion.....

somebody get me some TEA goddamnit says: (12:07:39 am)
if you can't imagine giving a person head, then you shouldn't date them.

somebody get me some TEA goddamnit says: (12:09:01 am)
i think i might write a book actually.

You know what? You really should! The 'If you build it they will come' theory is pure genius. I might even try it myself.

For this new wisdom, I thank you.

25 September 2006

Show me the way to go home.

This week I have mostly been drinking/drunk.Thursday night was Alex Klein's birthday. Unfortunately hardly anyone made it past the street beers stage and on to the roller disco. I guess the 10 quid entry fee put most people off, even more so than the idea of roller skating. We're all peasants you see. I felt bad for not going. Sorry Alex - I bet you managed to find something to wallie in your skates though!Plus Klein had the best/worst shoes I've seen in a while which must have sweetened the whole evening for him. Bwaaaa ha ha aha ahhahah ahh haa ha ha ha ! Look at his little face! Not into it!Cantelowes sesh on Saturday. You know why this photo has significance? They're all Pro! I know, stranger things have happened at sea. Nice of Fos to hold Pizzer's invisible todger.
It was such a boozy week even Fos got involved and relaxed with a cold can of wifebeater in the Tuesday shop.Random guy at Euston... "Can I take your photo pleeze? (I'm not a pervert, honestly. No, go fakie...thats' it... bend down a bit...uuuuuhhhhh!)"
Surprise SF2 champion of the week: Smithy! Motherfucker had all kinds of game at the table. We also discovered that Sagat vs. Sagat is probably the most fun you can have anywhere ever. TIGER!

Michelle's birthday this weekend. Tuaca's in the Battle on Saturday.... ....and Margaritas in some jazzy bar on Sunday. Emma's bag got nuff respeks all night.
Dylan was absolutely annihilated on Sunday. I told him to look gangsta - he obviously thought I said "You're a little teapot..."
Prize for "Most Hilarious And Useless Drunks" goes to...Emma and Dylan. The Academy salutes you. Nobody else was even close.
Beadle hand.

22 September 2006

Shit that bugs me today...

iPod covers. Why????? It's like "I know, I've just bought this thing that looks really nice so in order to protect it and make it look nice forever i'll stick this really horrible plastic/rubber/leather cover over it so it looks totally different and actually fucking awful! Why!?

Dickheads - It won't last forever no matter what you do with it. If you protect the outside then the inside will eventually die anyway. You'll probably only have it for 3 years, tops. At least it will look nice for a few weeks without a stupid cover. I know Apple made them beautiful and shiny and that they get fucked up and scratched if you even look at them wrong but jeeez - just deal with it, IT'S GOING TO GET SCRATCHED! Fuck it, so what? It's just a tool, it's the music that matters right?

It's like going and buying a nice new pair of shoes and immediately covering them in that shoe-goo repair stuff so that they last longer. That may be the case but you've just ruined a perfectly good pair of shoes. We all laugh our asses off at those people who put plastic covers on their sofas and carpets so why do it to your iPod/phone or whatever?

"But i'll be able to sell it for more one day if it's not scratched"

Shut up y'pansy!

I've saw a guy on the train today whose Nano, thanks to it's dumb leather case, looked bigger than my 30gb video one! KNOB!

Anyway, the recent ones finally come with a sensible thin little faux-suede wallet that only increases the size by a couple of millimetres or so and still enables you to take the damn thing out and caress it's lovely curves with out having to unbuckle it or whatever.

Moral: don't dress your iPod up like a technical support guy's mobile - let the motherfucker get scratched! You'll enjoy it more in the long run and you'll have that air of not giving a shit and look way cooler because of it.

OK, pointless venting aside this made me piss 'em and carries on nicely from yesterday's mesmerising dance extravaganza.

21 September 2006

The best thing EVER.

If you could see into my brain and looked at the department labelled "Music: What to do with it" this is what you'd see...
It's incredible how Mick and Dave have pretty much got all the same moves as me: the crocodile, the coat hanger, the hip replacement (dangerous but SPECTACULAR).

Roller disco tonight.

No Smiths lyrics will do this justice.

OK. See this girl?
I'm absolutely fucking marrying her alright? I can't even begin to explain how great she is but you can see for yourselves that she's really, REALLY beautiful, that's not open to question.

Her name is Lauren and we're getting married very soon (in the grand scheme of things) and you're all invited (well, some of you are). Nobody gets to argue this point and it's a done deal. The ceremony will probably be in Iceland so that should sort out the peasants from the players.

All you need is love.

See you there. x

20 September 2006

Landscape Paris trip 2006 photo-a-thon...

Ahhhhh. Paris. The sights. the sounds, the smells (often dogshit). Another Paris trip is over and I feel both glad to be back and wishing I was still there.

Here's the photographic evidence (as crappy as ever), warts and all. Take it or leave it.Eurostar journeys = iPod. Joan Jett videos = boner.
First evening view from Bastille. Sigh. How picture-skew.Fuck! Controlling your diet is a fucking nightmare when you're away from home. Look at all that shit! I'm screwed!
Text from Fos after I told him I actually had to edit the Landscape entry in La Rue Est Vers L'Image whilst I was in Paris - by Friday no less!
Rory is one of those kids that memorises stuff. He seems to have nearly all of The Office on lock. Here's his tribute to that episode where David Brent does the motivational speech.
Awwwww! This nice lady was worried Joey would hurt his head if he didn't wear a proper helmet. She didn't know it was actually a tribute to Pierre.This guy clocked me so bad when i was trying to get a picture of his moustache. I don't care - it was beautiful and it needed documenting.
Crew shot. Gay but mandatory on these kind of trips.

Without a doubt the gayest photo i've ever shot.
When it's hot and I have to film and skate all day I get sweaty. Black T-shirts seem to suffer the brunt of it. Gross huh?
Always nice to see The Fiske.

Don't even ask. I seriously worry about the Landscape lot sometimes.

All I said was "gimme some South Bank" and this happened. Jesus!Awwwwww! That's better!
What a surprise - we're in France and Tura initiates a dice game.

But he was a comedy drunk that night which more than made up for it. Pain et Fromage at about 2am.

Sometime bro-mance can go a bit too far.

When you're on the road one of the easiest ways to pass the time is to pick on the youngest guy. Even going as far as trying to push him in the canal can be very satisfying and can kill 30 seconds or so.

Poser of the month, Thrasher mag September 2006 (if I get round to sending it in)

Who said Landscape was a ledge-fag company? Rory clicked it to huge with this triple set!

This is Arnoud (maybe it's spelt Arnold, I dunno) - he organised the Rue Image wotsit thing. Blame him.
Premiere night party on Saturday. Mrs One cuts the first rug.
My favourite photo from the whole week. Tura is such a ruler - avec or sans handbags. Look how proud he looks!
No idea who this motherfucker was but I talked to him about Nas for ages outside the club.
"No Soy! Not even if you ask reeeeeally nicely!"
"No harm in askin' is there luv?"